I have learned that love must always be embraced with the wonder of a child; that the more freely and without fear two people are able to set aside past pains, that the walls between them fall flat and become the foundation of faith and truth upon which a home is built wherein an unfailing love is eternally warmed by the fire of spirit filled wisdom.
That Crown of Life is a reward for RIGHT NOW. It is that peace that passes all understanding that says whether you were raped, abused, lied to, disgraced, or lived a life you wasn’t proud of, when you join your life to growing in wisdom, you are yoking your baggage and your burdens to the love of God and they won’t feel so heavy anymore.
It sounds like you both need to have a heart to heart putting all your issues and fears on the table and then come up with a plan to face them together so that they are no longer obstacles to the future the two of you could so happily have. But you both have to be willing to do it.