fear of deep loveA QUESTION FROM A READER
hi how have u been I need ur advice n something. how do u control urself  from fallin too deep for someone

MY REPLY
One of my best friends is almost 80 and he said to me “just remember anything that happens overnight goes away just as fast unless it is the will of the Creator and all you need to do is stand behind Him and you will recognize what is really meant to be”.

That is something I have taken to heart in everything I do. But it isn’t easy, when you are struggling with being alone, to turn down someone who excites your heart. I run into the same thing in business when someone wants to step up and offer money for me to expand.

In both cases I ask, why is this person here? What do I really have to offer that they choose to be present in my life? And what might I be giving up in exchange? You have to ask yourself how much are you willing to sell away and give someone control over to have what you want right now?

You see the key to your question about controlling love really isn’t that different. You have to educate yourself about business in order to not be taken advantage of. And if you are an educated businessperson, you do not fear success no matter how fast it comes because you can measure everything you did right along the way. Likewise, if you examine your heart and your reasons and educate yourself and learn from your own successes and failures in love, you have no reason to fear or want to control how deep it goes no different than you would try to limit the amount of money you make.

If you have a need to control your depth of love for someone, you simply don’t trust yourself, and that may be for very good reasons. Fast love can often be as damaging as fast money. That is why most people who hit the lotto jackpot end up in worse financial shape and greater debt.  When it is not truly earned, you don’t know how to keep it. And once it’s gone, you don’t have the skills to make it again so you just keep gambling.

And that is what so many people keep doing with their hearts today on social media. Friends lists are lotto lines and scratch off tickets. You might as well be asking me how can you stop yourself from spending money you really don’t got on the lottery? The answer is simple. Stop playing with your heart. Stop standing in line with the other lotto addicts, because you already know once they “win you” all they gonna do is take whatever you are worth and turn you in for more tickets.

-Neo Blaqness